I hardly ever say that I'm too busy, or that I don't have enough time. Whenever people say that to me, I always tell them this fun story.
Back when I was a junior in high school, I was sitting in my advisory class, with one of my best friends sitting directly behind me.She wasn't in the best mood, telling me that she had so much work to do over the weekend, and that it wasn't possible to finish it all. I told her, "You have all weekend, that's 48 hours. You have enough time." My friend then exclaimed to me, "48 hours isn't enough time!" The teacher in that class overhead our conversation and approached us and said, "48 hours isn't enough time? Jack Bauer can save the world twice in 48 hours. He can stop two terrorist attacks in 48 hours." Ever since then, I've never complained about not having enough time.
Being a big basketball fan, and just being a big sports fan in general, I've learned to make the most of each minute. I remember one time trying to tell a group of my friends something, and, assuming that I was going to talk about basketball, they started teasing me. One of them thought I was going to say something like, "In basketball, five minutes is an eternity." While I wasn't going to say anything about basketball in general, I couldn't help but think, Yeah, that's true! In sports, a couple minutes, or even a couple seconds, can last forever. That's not because of all the time-outs called (well, actually it is) but because so much can be done in such a short little time. The average NBA team averaged about 100 points a game, but we can't forget, it only takes about 1/2 second to score a point! It's just about using our time wisely, and not falling into the mental pit of thinking that we have less time than we actually do.
Why we tend to feel at a crunch for time is that because we don't allocate our time properly. There's plenty of time to do stuff if we make it! I was watching a video of Bill Cosby on The Tonight Show with Johnny Carson, and something he said stood out to me. When Johnny remarked at how Bill Cosby is always busy, he replied with, "You got plenty of time to rest when you're dead." Hence, I always find there to be enough time.
Wednesday, November 16, 2011
Tuesday, November 8, 2011
Lesson #10: Be the same to everyone around you
One movie that I never tire of watching is Remember the Titans starring Denzel Washington. I love inspirational sports movies like that, and Titans provided me with many memorable scenes. One of these scenes, and I think a scene that represents the theme of the movie well, occurs after one of the team's first win of the season.
During the game, the Titans give up an early 7-0. When the Titans are on offense, Petey misses a tackle, causing the head coach, Boone, yell at him and to take him out of the game. Petey walks away dejected but is intercepted by assistant coach Yoast. Petey explains that he can't deal with Coach Boone's criticism and it just makes him play worse, so Coach Yoast tells Petey to come play for him on the defensive end (Boone is in charge of the offense, Yoast the defense). Though hesitant at first, Petey goes along with what Coach Yoast says and plays splendidly, helping lead the Titans to victory.
The next day, Coach Boone brings up Coach Yoast's move, calling it insubordination. Yoast explains that some players just don't respond well to public criticism, and that he just tells the boys what they need to know without humiliating them. Boone asks, "What boys?" and puts out that it's only the black players that Yoast seems to protect and patronize. Boone goes on to say:
"Now I may be a mean cuss. But I'm the same mean cuss with everybody out there on that football field. The world don't give a damn about how sensitive these kids are, especially the young black kids. You ain't doin' these kids a favor by patronizing them. You crippling them; You crippling them for life."
This leads me to my point. While I'm not suggesting that people be unkind and mean spirited, what I am saying is that however you act, act the same way to everybody. The context of the movie dealt with racism, but since I feel that any well-raised knows that to act differently towards one based on race, religion, sexual orientation, I want to focus on two types of people we subconsciously treat differently: the opposite gender and family.
From a guy's perspective, one of the things that kind of irritates me is when I try to talk to a guy, and he seems disinterested and unfriendly, but when that guy is with a group of girls, he's suddenly the most interesting person on the planet. I can't really speak so much for the female gender, but I've always noticed that guys tend to treat girls better than guys, as a way of trying to impress them, or even flirt with them. For instance, when I asked my dorm roommate how his midterm went, he just said, "Eh" and didn't even bother turning around to look at me. Yet, bring a couple of girls into the room, and he'll be talkative and charming. Now, there are a lot of guys who believe that women should be treated better, and I'm okay with that, but I don't necessarily agree. I've always believed in treating everybody as well as possible, and if you treat girls better than guys, then you're not making the effort to treat guys well too.
The second thing I mentioned is how we treat family. I think just about everybody acts different when they're socializing with peers, then when they're with relatives. People tend to be a little bit better in their public life than in their private life, because they can hide their lesser moments that way. One thing that I've noticed, though, is that most of the best people I know are family people. My theory for this is that how you treat your family, though it may be different, correlates with how you treat your friends. Being exposed to your family all the time growing up, that's where one practices and learns good qualities and traits. If we learn to act kind to our parents and siblings, then that naturally translates into how we act towards our friends.
Every act we may shapes who we are as a person, regardless of who we're interacting with. Thus, however you choose to act, be it towards a stranger, a family member, or a close friend, be the same to all.
During the game, the Titans give up an early 7-0. When the Titans are on offense, Petey misses a tackle, causing the head coach, Boone, yell at him and to take him out of the game. Petey walks away dejected but is intercepted by assistant coach Yoast. Petey explains that he can't deal with Coach Boone's criticism and it just makes him play worse, so Coach Yoast tells Petey to come play for him on the defensive end (Boone is in charge of the offense, Yoast the defense). Though hesitant at first, Petey goes along with what Coach Yoast says and plays splendidly, helping lead the Titans to victory.
The next day, Coach Boone brings up Coach Yoast's move, calling it insubordination. Yoast explains that some players just don't respond well to public criticism, and that he just tells the boys what they need to know without humiliating them. Boone asks, "What boys?" and puts out that it's only the black players that Yoast seems to protect and patronize. Boone goes on to say:
"Now I may be a mean cuss. But I'm the same mean cuss with everybody out there on that football field. The world don't give a damn about how sensitive these kids are, especially the young black kids. You ain't doin' these kids a favor by patronizing them. You crippling them; You crippling them for life."
This leads me to my point. While I'm not suggesting that people be unkind and mean spirited, what I am saying is that however you act, act the same way to everybody. The context of the movie dealt with racism, but since I feel that any well-raised knows that to act differently towards one based on race, religion, sexual orientation, I want to focus on two types of people we subconsciously treat differently: the opposite gender and family.
From a guy's perspective, one of the things that kind of irritates me is when I try to talk to a guy, and he seems disinterested and unfriendly, but when that guy is with a group of girls, he's suddenly the most interesting person on the planet. I can't really speak so much for the female gender, but I've always noticed that guys tend to treat girls better than guys, as a way of trying to impress them, or even flirt with them. For instance, when I asked my dorm roommate how his midterm went, he just said, "Eh" and didn't even bother turning around to look at me. Yet, bring a couple of girls into the room, and he'll be talkative and charming. Now, there are a lot of guys who believe that women should be treated better, and I'm okay with that, but I don't necessarily agree. I've always believed in treating everybody as well as possible, and if you treat girls better than guys, then you're not making the effort to treat guys well too.
The second thing I mentioned is how we treat family. I think just about everybody acts different when they're socializing with peers, then when they're with relatives. People tend to be a little bit better in their public life than in their private life, because they can hide their lesser moments that way. One thing that I've noticed, though, is that most of the best people I know are family people. My theory for this is that how you treat your family, though it may be different, correlates with how you treat your friends. Being exposed to your family all the time growing up, that's where one practices and learns good qualities and traits. If we learn to act kind to our parents and siblings, then that naturally translates into how we act towards our friends.
Every act we may shapes who we are as a person, regardless of who we're interacting with. Thus, however you choose to act, be it towards a stranger, a family member, or a close friend, be the same to all.
Sunday, November 6, 2011
Lesson #9: One system doesn't apply to everyone
When I was in my senior year of high school, I took a class known as college-leveled English class. Though it was a struggle at first, I soon mastered writing essays in that class, and by the end of the year, I got to a point where I had expected to get an "A" or something close. When I got to college, I had the feeling that I could write at a college level. Therefore, when I had to write my first essay, which was a history paper, I expected to have little difficulties with it. When I got the paper back, I found out that I had done horribly.
Writing encompasses a wide variety of types. How I wrote in my English class, which involved a lot of analysis, interpretation, and thought, was different then how I had to write in my History class, which required me more to say what was there, and not really think, but state. Even though I had excelled at essays in my English class, I had become so accustomed to writing a certain way, that when it was time to write a history paper, I faltered. I felt a bit down after receiving my grade (which led to the birth of lesson #8), but it taught me that just because I struggled with a history paper, I wasn't necessarily a bad writer. It was just that the system wasn't something I was used to.
In sports we here it all the time: Player A has the speed to play in the West Coast Offense or This guy really has the versatility to fit into the Triangle. In sports, part of how successful a player is is how much skill he has, but it's also about how well he fits into the system. You could be a 7'0, 300 lb center in the NBA and the best player on your team, but if you're coach has an offense that involves a fast paced, then you might be too slow to keep up with everybody else, and thus, you look worse than you really are.
Another example we could point to is in the acting world with Halle Berry. Is Halle Berry a good actress or a bad one? In 2002, she won an Academy Award for Best Actress for her role in Monster's Ball. Therefore, she must be a great actress! However, three years later, she got a Razzie Award for Worst Actress for her role as Catwoman.So she's a horrible actress? I don't really have an opinion as to her acting abilities, but most likely, she's somewhere in between. What made her best one year and worst another year had to do with the system she was in, and in these situations, the system was the role she wast cast.
Think back to a couple posts ago when I talked about how everyone was a genius. Once we find what we're good at, we also need to find a system that really shows how good we can be.
Lesson #8: A good attitude is a powerful tool for a bad event
One of my favorite commercials features this little boy trying to hit a baseball. He declares himself the greatest hitter in the world, throws the ball up, swings, and misses. He calls that strike one, but again, declares himself the greatest hitter in the world. Once more, picks up the ball, throws it up in the air, swings, and for the second time, misses. The boy calls that strike two, but doesn't stop. For the third time, he declares himself the greatest hitter in the world, and repeats the whole process, and, for the final time, misses again. With that being strike three, he stands silently for a moment, before finally screaming, "I'm the greatest pitcher in the world!"
After something devastating happens, or things don't go the way we want them too, we're now faced with the challenge of how to overcome feeling bad. We mope, complain, look for excuses, but in the end, we just feel awful. Confidence is loss, we say we suck, and we struggle with how we're supposed to move on. It's important to note that, as my Business Law teacher once said, "Failure is an event, not a person." If we let ourselves feel bad for one thing that happens, then we let it affect everything that follows.
In statistics, there Law of Averages is non-existent, but numbers aren't always a good tool in life. I remember watching a Seattle Sonic basketball game, and the commentator was telling a story about Ray Allen. Allen had shot five three-pointers, and had only made one of them. Rather than feel put down about making only one, Allen said to himself that since he's a 40% 3-point shooter, then he's going to make three out of his next five, because then he'll average out to 40%. The way I like to think about it, a below average performance just means that an above average performance is soon to come.
I'm a big fan of Rocky Balboa, so here's some words of wisdom from Rocky himself to complete this lesson!
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=V1tXhJniSEc
After something devastating happens, or things don't go the way we want them too, we're now faced with the challenge of how to overcome feeling bad. We mope, complain, look for excuses, but in the end, we just feel awful. Confidence is loss, we say we suck, and we struggle with how we're supposed to move on. It's important to note that, as my Business Law teacher once said, "Failure is an event, not a person." If we let ourselves feel bad for one thing that happens, then we let it affect everything that follows.
In statistics, there Law of Averages is non-existent, but numbers aren't always a good tool in life. I remember watching a Seattle Sonic basketball game, and the commentator was telling a story about Ray Allen. Allen had shot five three-pointers, and had only made one of them. Rather than feel put down about making only one, Allen said to himself that since he's a 40% 3-point shooter, then he's going to make three out of his next five, because then he'll average out to 40%. The way I like to think about it, a below average performance just means that an above average performance is soon to come.
I'm a big fan of Rocky Balboa, so here's some words of wisdom from Rocky himself to complete this lesson!
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=V1tXhJniSEc
Wednesday, November 2, 2011
#7: Everybody is a Genius
Albert Einstein is perhaps the greatest mind ever to have graced this Earth, and he said:
"Everybody is a genius, but if you judge a fish by its ability to climb a tree, it will spend its whole life believing that it is stupid."
The definition of intelligence and who's smart and who's not has always intrigued me. As we grow up and progress through the educational system, we determine who's the smart one based on what grades they get. We think that the guy who aces every test must be super smart, and the gal who barely passed her paper is dumb. The reason we do this is simply because it's easy. Everyone has a number or letter attached to them, and that in turns, provides for an intellectual stereotype. While grades are important, this form of judgment that we have in our early year is quite flawed.
Think of the adults in your life, or maybe even the people in the news. We think of people like former President Bush as dumb, and most of the billionaires in the world as geniuses. Most people confidently establish their opinon of who's smart and who's not without even knowing what their GPA was or how they did in school. We judge people's intelligence on the decisions they make and how they act, not how many questions they get right or wrong on a test.
In my mind, if you want to know who's smart, take a look at the decisions they make. If most of the decisions they make are good, then they're smart, if not, then they're dumb. The problem that arises here, though, is that the ability to make the right decisions varies from topic to topic for each person. For instance, from NBA star Dennis Rodman was seen as wild, reckless, and dumb. Yet, when he played basketball, there was hardly a player that knew the game of basketball and its ins and outs as well as he. Does that make him smart or dumb? Jimmy Carter was a great huminatarian and won the Nobel Peace Prize, but the decisions he made as President left Americans unhappy. Is Jimmy Carter intelligent or stupid?
This is where Einstein's quote comes in. We call all be seen as an expert or a genius if we're in the right field. Rodman may not make the smartest life decisions, but he was a brilliant basketball player. The Presidency wasn't the thing for Jimmy Carter, but he looks incredibly bright when it comes to how to help society. What it all comes down to, is that we're all geniuses in a way; we just need to find out in what way. There were times after I failed a Physics test where I felt dumb, but what if I had never taken a Physics class to begin with? Then I'd feel pretty smart.
All in all, there's actually two things I learned that I'm trying to convey: 1) Be part of an environment you love and know well, and 2) Make good decisions in life.
"Everybody is a genius, but if you judge a fish by its ability to climb a tree, it will spend its whole life believing that it is stupid."
The definition of intelligence and who's smart and who's not has always intrigued me. As we grow up and progress through the educational system, we determine who's the smart one based on what grades they get. We think that the guy who aces every test must be super smart, and the gal who barely passed her paper is dumb. The reason we do this is simply because it's easy. Everyone has a number or letter attached to them, and that in turns, provides for an intellectual stereotype. While grades are important, this form of judgment that we have in our early year is quite flawed.
Think of the adults in your life, or maybe even the people in the news. We think of people like former President Bush as dumb, and most of the billionaires in the world as geniuses. Most people confidently establish their opinon of who's smart and who's not without even knowing what their GPA was or how they did in school. We judge people's intelligence on the decisions they make and how they act, not how many questions they get right or wrong on a test.
In my mind, if you want to know who's smart, take a look at the decisions they make. If most of the decisions they make are good, then they're smart, if not, then they're dumb. The problem that arises here, though, is that the ability to make the right decisions varies from topic to topic for each person. For instance, from NBA star Dennis Rodman was seen as wild, reckless, and dumb. Yet, when he played basketball, there was hardly a player that knew the game of basketball and its ins and outs as well as he. Does that make him smart or dumb? Jimmy Carter was a great huminatarian and won the Nobel Peace Prize, but the decisions he made as President left Americans unhappy. Is Jimmy Carter intelligent or stupid?
This is where Einstein's quote comes in. We call all be seen as an expert or a genius if we're in the right field. Rodman may not make the smartest life decisions, but he was a brilliant basketball player. The Presidency wasn't the thing for Jimmy Carter, but he looks incredibly bright when it comes to how to help society. What it all comes down to, is that we're all geniuses in a way; we just need to find out in what way. There were times after I failed a Physics test where I felt dumb, but what if I had never taken a Physics class to begin with? Then I'd feel pretty smart.
All in all, there's actually two things I learned that I'm trying to convey: 1) Be part of an environment you love and know well, and 2) Make good decisions in life.
Tuesday, November 1, 2011
#6: No Matter What, Always Do Good
I remember hearing a story on the news about this young girl who was a waitress. She worked at this place where this man would come every single day for breakfast. Now, this man was said to be rude, grumpy, and just plain out mean, and none of the servers wanted to have anything to do with him. That left this young girl to be the one who served him everyday. As unfriendly and mean as they man may have been, the girl always did her best to be as nice as possible, because that was the right thing to do.
At one point, the people working at the restaurant noticed that the old man had not showed up for a couple days. They soon found out that he had died. What made this story newsworthy, though, was that in his will, the man had left that young girl, the girl who was willing to deal with him and be kind to him, his car.
Throughout my life, I've heard so much the phrase, "Be the bigger man." That is truly easier to say than do. If we take a look in politics, part of the reason candidates criticize another is because they were criticized first. It's only human nature to try to look good, so if we're attacked, we attack back in order to regain a sense of superiority or decency. In the course of human history, all it's taken for a war to start is for one nation to retaliate to an attack from another.
Now, in the example I gave, the girl got a reward for her kindness, but that's not to say that we will always get something in return for tolerance or being nice. We shouldn't be nice just because we hope to get something out of it, but because it's the right thing to do, even if it may be difficult at times. I can only hope that Uncle Jesse in Full House (a favorite show of mine when I was younger) was right when he said to the Olsen twin character that being nice was contagious. If we all just be kind to one another and do good regardless of how we're treated, it will affect others and change can and will slowly occur.
At one point, the people working at the restaurant noticed that the old man had not showed up for a couple days. They soon found out that he had died. What made this story newsworthy, though, was that in his will, the man had left that young girl, the girl who was willing to deal with him and be kind to him, his car.
Throughout my life, I've heard so much the phrase, "Be the bigger man." That is truly easier to say than do. If we take a look in politics, part of the reason candidates criticize another is because they were criticized first. It's only human nature to try to look good, so if we're attacked, we attack back in order to regain a sense of superiority or decency. In the course of human history, all it's taken for a war to start is for one nation to retaliate to an attack from another.
Now, in the example I gave, the girl got a reward for her kindness, but that's not to say that we will always get something in return for tolerance or being nice. We shouldn't be nice just because we hope to get something out of it, but because it's the right thing to do, even if it may be difficult at times. I can only hope that Uncle Jesse in Full House (a favorite show of mine when I was younger) was right when he said to the Olsen twin character that being nice was contagious. If we all just be kind to one another and do good regardless of how we're treated, it will affect others and change can and will slowly occur.
Monday, October 31, 2011
Lesson #5: It Really Is Quality, Not Quantity
Heading into college, there's kind of a bit of pressure to try to make new friends. Along with learning, people say college is about socializing and meeting new people. As a result, I was a little fascinated when I was talking to a really old friend, and she said something along the lines that making friends was overrated. After thinking about that, I've find that to be true. I've always wanted to have a lot of friends, but I've found that making more friends doesn't always lead to more happiness.
I'm going to talk about basketball for a moment. In my opinion, the greatest team ever assembled in NBA history was the 1996 Chicago Bulls, which had a record-breaking 72 wins, compared to only 10 losses. The star player on that team was a guy we all know, the greatest of all time, Michael Jordan. Along with that, Chicago had another All-Star in Scottie Pippen. Aside from those two, though, there wasn't anyone else on that team that a lot of people would have considered great, or close to an All-Star.
Still talking in terms of basketball, let's take a look at the 2011 Boston Celtics. On that team, there were 4 different All Stars (for those who don't know much about the NBA, there's 12 players on a roster on each All Star team), and yet, those Celtics didn't even make it into the NBA Finals. If we go back a couple years earlier, we can take a look at the 2006 Detroit Pistons, who, like Boston, had 4 All Stars, but didn't make it to the NBA Finals either.
The explanation for this all has to do with the top. When a team's best player is the greatest player alive, that team is going to go far, just like Chicago always did with Michael Jordan. The Celtics and the Pistons, though they had many All Stars, didn't have a single player who probably would have been considered one of the top 20 players in the league. Even though basketball is a team sport, when the game really matters, a team will be carried and led by their best player. That's why Chicago, even devoid of as much great players, was so successful, because they were led by Michael Jordan. In contrast, Detroit and Chicago, even with all their great players, didn't have a truly great player to lead them to a championship.
All that I've just said may seem like a simplified lesson in basketball theory, but it really applies to life as well. We can make all the friends we want, but unless those friends are great and meaningful, then they'll have little impact in our lives. It's nice to have a lot of friends, but if we don't have that one or two friends that we can tell everything to, and that we would trust with our lives, we probably wouldn't be truly happy. That's probably why people are always wanting a boyfriend or a girlfriend, because then they have that one person they can always rely on.
To add to that, think of the show FRIENDS (that's one of my favorite shows, by the way). For those who don't know the show, it basically chronicles the life of this group of six friends. For most of my life, I've always wanted to have a life just like those characters, but here's the thing about it: for most of the series, it never seemed like those guys had friends outside of their group of six! Yet, fans all around envied the characters, not for the number of friendships they had, but for the closeness they had with their small group.
Making friends is always fun, and it's always good for life. However, make the friendships meaningful. It's the special friends that'll truly impact your life, and I'd take a couple special friends than a hundred acquaintances any day!
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